Day 4: Pub Crawl and Wild Cougar

The wildlife on board the ship again plays prominently into the day’s activities. That will have to wait until it chronological time in today’s report.

Father time (or at least the Gnomes in charge of time zones) keeps messing with me. We awoke yesterday docked in Mazatlan. One of my favorite activities on board is being on deck as the ship pulls in to dock. I enjoy watching the lines get tossed, pulled in and cinched tight. But, with the time change, and early arrival, I slept through docking.

Wife and I are Midwesterners, so we’ve been on Eastern time for almost all of our lives. Then, wife’s job got her temporarily assigned out to Sunny California. She spent December getting used to a three hour swing in time. I came out for the last (almost) three weeks of that time, and got my internal clock reset to a later sunrise and bedtime.

As the Jewel travels down the Baja coast, we lost an hour (sprung our clocks forward) once in Cabo. Now again, while I slept, we lost another hour, and pulled into (today as I write this) Puerto Vallarta while I slept. Darn Time Change Gnomes.

But, as Sin the Cruise Director (HOLA! SIN!) says, “Don’t worry, we give those two hours back to you on the sea days…”

First a three hour shift for wife and I, just got used to it, then twice in one week, we gain an hour back. Since we’ll be heading back to Eastern Time Zone once the cruise is over, great! We’ll be partially adjusted again.. Oh, wait, we get to go back those two hours in the next two days. Back to West Coast time… then a flight back to East Coast time. Blech. We’re going to be so screwed up on time zones when we get home.

Something tells me the coffee gnomes planned this out just to screw with me. I need to find a way to get even with them.

Pub Crawling

Yesterday, several couples from our Cruise Critic meetup group got together for a pub crawl. We began at O’Sheehans on Deck 8 mid (BTW: wife and I had lunch there, she got the meatloaf, I had the burger – which comes equipped, as it should, with a couple of strips of bacon.)

The bar at O’Sheehans is a good place to sit. I ended up on the end of our group, and spent most of our time there chatting with a couple not attached to our group.

After that, we headed down to Bar City (Maltings, Shakers, and Magnum) Deck 6 mid. We were an hour before the bars opened, but the staff was very accommodating, and got our orders as soon as they got the bar restocked. Wife discovered the Rum Cake drink, which she says tastes like Chocolate. Another cruiser liked the Lavender Patch

While there, the ladies discussed the best place to get a massage in Mazatlan. Seems the going rate is about $15 to 20 US. We also got to pass around our Whale Watchers’ (from Cabo) phones with pics of the humpback whales they got to get up close to.

Then we headed up to the Great Outdoors. I was concerned that the area might not be open. I had spent the morning there, typing away on this journal, and then arguing with the internet on the ship to get it uploaded. After wasting about 30 minutes of my internet time, I gave up, and discovered that the ropes were up, and crew were directing guests back inside.

Seems that Wednesday was the day to wash the deck of the outdoor café. As I prowled the sports deck later, I saw the maintenance crew, in a boom lift from the dock, as well as the hanging maintenance gantry that prowls the outside of the ship, working to knock off the inevitable rust spots along the outside of the café area. As I look around this morning, I see quite a few small red-primer patches dotting the railing, waiting on their coat of white paint.

Fortunately, our brain cells waiting to be buzzed were in luck. They had reopened the area. Most of the group ordered the Rebellious Fish drink, and pronounced it yummy. We also grazed on cookies and other goodies from the snack buffet.

We got underway while hanging out in the Great Outdoors. This made for some great sunset selfies, and another whale sighting off in the distance.

We finished at Sugarcane Mojito bar (up on 13, midship). This is inside of Moderno, but the bar is available without the dinner reservations. The Mojito crowd liked the Rhaspberry Mojito, with meh reactions to the Coconut one… too much lime in the coconut in that one.

Wife and I excused ourselves from the killing off of brain cells, and headed off to dinner in one of the dining rooms. I had the Tenderloin steak slices, and she had another pasta dish, Chicken Parmesan.

The Shows

Following that was entertainment. We had missed the early main show, so we headed up to Spinaker to listen to the show band. That was followed by the four vocalists from the dance company singing cabaret style with piano accompaniment. The covered some interesting and fun show tunes.

Then we headed down to catch the Russian aerialist couple, Duo Déjà vu. An excellent show. Evgeny is an excellent vocalist, and provided vocal numbers in both Russian and English in between aerial sets. Catherine, his wife, was graceful with the various curtains, ribbons, straps and a suspended cage.

We’re not sure why some folks wait until a show is almost over before entering the theater and making everyone in a row stand to take the last two seats left. My wife did get a bit grumpy, but didn’t say anything. We’ve noticed on this trip that quite a few folks are coming in late to the shows in the theater, finding seats inside the row, that cause most of row to have to stand while the performance is underway. A couple of times, folks have entered with only about 15 minutes left in the show. Oh, well.

One mother, who sent her preteen son in to save four seats next to us, came in about seven minutes into the show, forcing about six of us to stand in front of the folks behind us, and block their view so the late arrivals could get to the saved seats. The mother sat next to my wife, and took quite a few photos of the performers with her cell phone. Wife would be enjoying the performance, and a block of light from the woman’s cell phone would appear at the edge her field of vision, distracting her.

Other than “that woman” in the audience, it was a great show.

Wildlife on the Prowl

Following the Déjà vu show, we headed back up to Spinaker (why are those two venues so far apart???? Asthma boy can’t run up six flights of stairs without a rest stop at deck 11) for the Dance Like A Norwegian contest.

My wife’s dance partner from the first night, Christian, was one of the celebrity dancers, so she seemed to have a personal interest in his success. I, on the other hand, preferred one of the Dance company’s professional dancers, Montana.

Our contestants were varied – but two stood out. My favorite was a gent we’ll refer to as “Frat Boy” based on how the judges, including Sin (in his Grumpy role), and JP (the funny magician from opening night), referred to him. “Frat Boy” came with his own cheering section, that looked suspiciously like a large section of this fraternity brothers.

I don’t have a photo of the wild cougar, or the dancing – so I’ll post a pretty sunset.

Wife, of course, was already set to cheer from Cruise Staff Christian, who was dressed in a spiffy black suit, with bow tie, and black hat similar to one you’d expect to see in old photos of the Rat Pack. One thing was missing, though. Christian had no shirt on. Judges in their preliminary comments said they wanted to see nudity on the dance floor – but warned Christian not to go there right away.

The dancers hit the floor and shook their booties. Action got hot and heavy through three different songs with different rhythms. Christian and his partner kept most of their clothes on, while Montana and “Frat Boy” bumped and ground their way through the songs.

Following round one, JP was the first judge to comment on Christian being great with the cougars, referring to the middle-aged woman that was grooving with him. She quickly embraced the label, and lobbed snarky comment back at the judges whenever she and Christian were the targets of Sin’s or JP’s comments.

Eventually, three other couples were voted off by the judges, and a final round with Christian and Cougar woman, Frat Boy and Montana, and other couple, who we will refer to as “Third Place Couple.”

Another round of dancing, this time solo, to a random set of preselected rhythms. Third Place Couple drew Riverdance as their rhythm. A valiant effort ensued, but the other two couples were connecting with the audience. That was key, because eventually, we got to cheer to decide the winner.

Montana and her new Fraternity buddy got Sir Mix A lot, “I Like Big Butts” for their piece. Much hilarity and pelvic thrusting ensued. I spied Christian across the dance floor, with his Cougar partner. He was speaking into her ear, obviously plotting their next dance routine.

By default, they ended up with the Tango. After a few trips across the dance floor in a Tango only slightly better than I could perform (I have zero rhythm and don’t even pretend to dance), Christian drug a chair out onto the floor. He pointed commandingly at the chair. Cougar shook her head and pointed for Christian to sit. He forcefully pointed, commanding her to sit. Eventually she did. Christian’s pants when flying into the audience.

His bright blue gym shorts kept the R-rating of the show intact. To our delight much booty shaking occurred, including when Cougar swapped places with him, and gave a quick (fully clothed) lap dance to her dance partner.

After comments from the judges, another free form dance off from all three couples (including “Thriller” where Cougar got her claws out, according to one of the judges), it was time to vote.

Third place team finished third. Wife cheered and clapped for her dance buddy and the Cougar. I yelled and pounded the table along with the fraternity brothers. Despite the hat, and the bright blue shorts, Frat Boy and Montana prevailed. The Fraternity house belched forth its occupants as they mobbed their fellow brother on the dance floor. Much jumping chest bumping ensued as consolation prizes were distributed to Mr. Third Place, and Cougar Lady.

Side note here, and special shout out to Sin!

I’ve spent 15+ years in the event industry. I tend to watch not only the action, but the sidelines as well (wedding and event photography isn’t always right in front of me – the good photo opportunities are all around me). As the fraternity brothers mobbed their fellow brother, Sin was up, and at Montana’s side. He quickly escorted her off the dance floor and away from the drunk mob of high-fiving, chanting, and chest bumping fraternity gents. Hat’s off to Sin for making sure his female crewmember wasn’t caught up in the press of alcohol-fueled gentlemen.

One Comment

  1. Beverly
    April 25

    Very well put. Big shoutout to Sin. I really missed him on my last cruise.

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